Advice to Scott Walker from the World's Greatest Mom

8 May 2011

Dear Scott Walker,

I had no intention of letting you ruin my Mothers' Day, but somehow, you did.  I was going to go to the Mother's Day Picnic at the Capitol, and spend the day just relaxing with my kids. I was going to take a day off. But I couldn't. Because of you.

For starters, I couldn't get the image out of my mind of you in that hideous camouflage jacket, pretending you like going fishing during your annual gubernatorial publicity event, event though the protest had been planned for ages. And I couldn't stop thinking of the interview in which you, of course, insulted the protesters (and by extension, me personally) by saying "most people in this state go fishing to get away from politics, from business..." Which made me immediately feel exactly the same way I felt when I heard you were out bowling and the rest of us were raging against the preposterous gall with which you continue to "govern" this state.  (I put "govern" in quotes to make it clear that I don't think you're a very good governor - in fact, I refuse even to acknowledge you with the title of "governor" until you begin to show that office the respect it deserves by engaging in actual dialogue with your consituents.  So now you have a goal to work toward!)

Anyway, your callous remarks - while intended, of course, to be yet another subtle yet direct insult to anyone opposed to your illegal and dictatorial abuse of office, really got me thinking about how impossible it's been, ever since you took office (and even before, really, when the threat of your reign of terror prevented our TAA union contract from going through last fall). Because you really, truly believe you can leave your conscience at the office and chill out on the lake while the rest of us agonize over what the hell we're going to do with our lives if you are successful in your irrepressible efforts to ruin them. 

So even though it's Mothers' Day, and even though I just so happen to be the world's greatest mother (as evidenced below), I wasn't able to leave this business in the Capitol. I wasn't able to "get away" from politics. Because the people of Wisconsin, Scott Walker, cannot just "get away" from the consequences of your actions, as much as you like to try to convince yourself that these consequences are entirely noble and - in the long run - the best for us.  Because, in the long run, people are going to be jobless, and homeless and without insurance.  People like me. And then, while you are sitting on a boat with some people you barely know, you'll be forced, I hope, to have a terrible time. Because you'll be thinking about how you ruined the life of the world's greatest mom, and how she'll never, ever forgive you for that.  And you should never forgive yourself for it, either.

Luckily for you, though, I give out complimentary advice on almost any topic and have the perfect, and perfectly simple, solution to our problem: just resign.  It's that easy.  Do it.

Until then, thanks for ruining my Mothers' Day, and I wish you the absolute worst in your visit to Washington, D.C. to impress your benefactors (the DeVos Foundation for the Destruction of Public Education) by spreading the outrageous lie of how "successful" Milwaukee charter schools are, despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary. I have a feeling I'll be sharing more on this later this week. For now, just know I fully oppose your measures to take national your attempts to defund and destroy public schools while you use tax payer money to support private education and I will not be silent as you continue to mislead the public into thinking you support education while you work constantly to undermine it.  I hope you make as humiliating an impression as you did when you testified before Congress recently, if not worse.  And I hope there are tons of people there to give you the same "welcome" you got on your I-don't-give-a-crap-about-the-consequences-of-my-actions fishing trip.

Again, resign.

Heather DuBois Bourenane

World's Greatest Mother and Outraged Wisconsin Citizen

See that? "Best mom ever." That's me. So take my advice, and resign. Unless you hate mothers, which wouldn't really surprise me.